The Hangover

Of all the movies why did I pick this? Because it is an easy background movie.
One and a quarter thumbs up.

Frida

What an amazing crazy life she led; certainly with a lot of drama provided by Diego putting his dick in every woman.
One thumbs up - I really liked how they interspersed the paintings, and discovering the one of her sister (it looks so serene).

Miss Congeniality

I am pretty happy with my cake, if you ignore that 1/8th collapsed.
One thumbs up, and Sandra Bullock produced this too.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

I should be happy because of Asian female in prominent role, but NO!; she was so unnecessary and unbelievable (electrician turned sudden fighter pilot?) and especially that kiss! Argh!
Half a thumbs up - it was too choppy between scenes - we have a great scene with Rey and Kylo, and then you decide to break away in the middle of that?!

Lady Gaga: Five Foot Two

I am so desperate to find those pink cat-eye sunglasses!
Half a thumbs up.

The Christmas Prince

Twitter was right; I too question if it is the same guy throughout the movie - what a forgettable face.
One thumbs down - it is as bad as the title sounds, going from lame to ridiculous.

The Disaster Artist

Who knew the same handsome James Franco who played James Dean, could also play Tommy Wiseau to a tee, especially that laugh!
Two thumbs up -  it is hilarious, weird and sweet (Dave Franco really shone through); and this might be a rash decision but this might be my favourite new movie of 2017.
(Post Edit: Looking back at this year's new movies, only Lion or La La Land come close, but I am still going to give it to The Disaster Artist because there was no wasted time)

Gone With the Wind

It was to be a surprise date night from Josh.... until I accidentally ruined the surprise two weeks ago.
Two thumbs up - I love that he was prepared to put himself through this marathon he probably would not like; and we made it most of the way (1 hour to go!)

The Proposal

I shouldn't have eaten the instant noodles :(
One thumbs up - this is always entertaining, and I forgot about the cute puppy!!

Easy A

My stomach hurts; I really hope it was not because of canh cua.
Half a thumbs up - I think not having school uniforms partly allowed the situation to get that far (that would never happen here).

The Room

It is like a Transylvania muppet was implanted into a bad cheesy 90s movie.
How to rate this... "so bad it's good" but I also wouldn't watch it often.

The Sixth Day

The clone marker on the bottom eyelid just looks like a stye! I would have thought nothing of it and recommended hot compresses hehe.
Zero thumbs up - it wasn't terrible, but it wasn't amazing either.

Lost in Translation

No Josh we cannot stay there, we don't have the money.
Half a thumbs up.

Legally Blonde

Ew, you cannot use the same pet name for different girlfriends.
Three quarters thumbs up - it is still fun.

Love Actually

Dad: Oh, I know this song!
Me: Not like this you don't.
Two thumbs up, despite the occasional creep in hindsight.

Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind

I got Patrick Stewart right!
Half a thumbs up - it is a good meaningful concept but I was slightly bothered by the electronic music at seemingly random times that didn't fit the scene.

The Prestige

This was definitely the better magic film for that time - who on Earth remembers or even saw the other one? (The Illusionist with Edward Norton, who was born in Boston).
One and a quarter thumbs up.

Drop Dead Gorgeous

Josh let out a good hearty laugh when the retard dance-cheers Amber Atkins on the states question - I am really glad he enjoyed this movie.
One and a quarter thumbs up.

Edge of Tomorrow

I have watched this movie twice now (cinema and home) and cannot recall the ending at all... because I keep falling asleep! Not because it is bad or boring; must be the soothing action noises.
One thumbs up, and laughs for Josh's "British" accent when retelling the ending to me "What? Is there something on my face?"

Cinema Paradiso

Oh Alfredo!
One and a half thumbs up - it was sweet and beautifully quaint - now this is the first classic Italian film I have liked (Fellini is not my cup of tea)

Thor: Ragnarok

Turns out the guy was using cinema approved subtitles device, and not blatantly pirating the movie ("Don't you just love sitting next to a federal crime?" - Josh)
One thumbs up - that was actually really fun and funny, and Hemsworth is a charming hunk of muscle.

Bridget Jones' Diary

The character is supposed to be fat (2001) but now she just looks average; and I weigh the same as her now :(

One and three quarters thumbs up, but getting old and fat and 30 are all too real. 

Spotlight

I was a bit upset when Josh 'joked' that he was the red pen and I was black, when I thought we were equal black pens.
One and a half thumbs up - it is just disgusting how the Church passes the paedophiles along; but the film was riveting and actually really good.

Julie and Julia

If you get over Julia Childs' voice, she seems like an optimistic wonderful lady; unlike Julie who is a bit too selfish about this project.
One thumbs up - I think I am maturing, because I used to be very annoyed by Julia Childs.

The Devil Wears Prada

High fashion is so elitist; but also so pretty argh!

One and three quarters thumbs up, and I think I will get those Celine sunglasses.

Man on the Moon

Basically he is some narcissist weirdo whose antics are only funny to himself, and as some IMdB user put it "enjoyed producing a negative effect in his audience far more than he cared about entertaining them"

Two thumbs down - though I can appreciate Jim Carrey's acting and those beady eyed and curled lip mannerisms, it was excruciating to watch because I could not have been more annoyed by him. 

Me, Myself, Irene

When I first watched this when I much younger, I thought the cow scene was the most controversial/horrifying/memorable; but how did all the dildos go over my head?
Half a thumbs down, and not sure it was smart to write "dildos go over my head"

O Brother Where Art Thou?

I accidentally confused the Coen brothers (who did this) with the Wachowski brothers (Matrix) and incorrectly told Josh they are transgender women now.
Zero thumbs up - honestly I had such a difficult time understanding the dialogue because of the accents that the cognitive effort needed detracted from understanding the plot and relaxing and enjoying it.

How to Be Single

I completely relate to the zipper problem; but I don't believe the magnet pulley would work (it takes too much force to pull the zipper up and I don't think the magnetic attraction is enough with the tiny zipper handle)
Half a thumbs up - that was actually not remotely as bad as the poster looks, and yes Sue and Reb, I too like the ending.

The Grand Budapest Hotel

Ralph Fiennes' posh voice is grand and buttery and wonderful in this - has he always spoken like this?? (edit: NO - "Ralph Feinnes partly based his character's vocal traits on British comic actor Leonard Rossiter" IMDb)
One thumbs up - I never took to this one like other Wes Anderson movies, but it is growing on me more and more with repeated viewings.

The Emperor's New Groove

Cronk was funny but that was about it.

Zero thumbs up - oh my sweet Joshie, how you tried to convince me it was funny.

Ocean's Eleven

I don't think you can enter casinos with your sunglasses on these days (the twins acting as bodyguards for the old man Saul).
One thumbs up.

Kingsman: The Secret Service

Apparently Samuel L. Jackson improvised the lisp in, on the basis that Bond villains typically have some form of physical deformity, and that he used to have a lisp... but still, WHY?! It serves no purpose here.
One thumbs up - it is a fun film, and snickered laughter when I found the trivia that the 4 digit password he punches to open the Swedish princess' cell at the end spells out A-N-A-L hehe.

Coyote Ugly

If this movie were made today, I think it would be accused of slut-shaming; which I would probably also be accused of too.
Half a thumbs up - fun movie, gross bar.

Logan Lucky

Adam Driver has the same hair in everything - Josh reckons it is because he was in the Marines.
One and a quarter thumbs up - actually quite good, and loved how they embraced the redneck-ness with Cletus brothers and slutty hot hairdresser.

Vicky Christina Barcelona

Christina: "You went through my luggage?!"
Maria Elena: "Of course I went through your luggage!... I wanted to know who was really sharing the bed of my ex-husband"
C: "What?!"
ME: "Who knew what I would find there? How could I be sure you were not going to hurt me? After all, I had thoughts of killing you"
Classic Maria Elena.
One and five-sixths thumbs up - went to watch this again because the long lazy lunch Reb and I had at Osteria Emilia reminded me of this.

Rush Hour

They all speak Cantonese, but then she says 'thank you' in Mandarin 'xie xie'?
One and a half thumbs up - good times always.

Dunkirk

Oh this is an interesting start, having complete silence with him running, this is effective... oh wait, it was a mistake by the cinema, there was supposed to be sound.
One thumbs up - the music/score is amazing (I felt stressed and tense the entire time), but I don't think this is his greatest film, for example I thought Inception was better.

Back to the Future 2

Was disproportionately annoyed by the future bully gang's crazy anger levels. 

Three quarters thumbs up, and highly amused but also disturbed at how Donald Trump is basically Biff in real life. 

The Blind Side

There is something oddly comforting about this movie.
One thumbs up - but as I am becomiing aware about the whole 'white savior' trope, I am concerned if that is why I like this? (But I am not even white...?)

Baby Driver

Did not expect Yvonne to be a fan of the car-heist or magic-heist genres hehe.
Zero thumbs up - despite having many initial factors going against it (dumb name "Baby"?! dumb trailer and Ansel Elgort's annoying smirky face), it was not as terrible as I thought it would be; however also not as great as the critics are raving.

Spiderman: Homecoming

Kudos to Tom Holland for 1. making Peter Parker/Spiderman feel like a genuine likeable teenager, and 2. for that slammin' bod and actually not being a teenager in real life hehe.
One thumbs up - that was enjoyable, but I still don't care for Zendaya.

The Lego Batman Movie

One thumbs up - I giggled like a child much more than I thought I would.

Django Unchained

Did you know that the term "Mandingo" was not actually used back in those times? Tarantino took that word from an older movie "Mandingo" which did refer to slave fighters.
One thumbs up - and hey that is John Jarrett! I tested his eyes! He has met Tarantino then! Good on him!

Bridesmaids

Puppies as party favours is so irresponsible... but they are so cute in their tuxedo collars at the end! (Still need to find one for Snitzel)
One and 5/6th's thumbs up - Helen is hilarious - and this almost always puts me in a good mood.

Wonder Woman

It opened at number one in China; for some reason, I didn't think it would have been released in China. Never forget the Chinese market!
Half a thumbs up - I felt it was a bit silly/ridiculous at times, but god Gal Gadot is beautiful to look at.

The Beguiled

I feel I was waiting for a secret to be revealed but it never came!
Half a thumbs up - I was engaged the entire time and I did not mind it, but I don't think I love it.

Sliding Doors

Jerry is a twat.
One thumbs up - I like how there are only a handful of characters and they are all played perfectly, but most importantly... remember Sliding Doors?!

Cafe Society

Worried about Josh; he is not letting me help.
One and a quarter thumbs up, so beautiful as usual, but the brother and sister storylines could have been reduced a bit.

The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou

"Cate Blanchett's accent... I don't buy it" - Nicole.
Nicole, I whole-heartedly agree.
Three quarter thumbs up - the details are nice and I am loving the French David Bowie covers.
Post Edit: The covers were in Portuguese. My bad.

Marie Antoinette

Cannot believe Josh had no idea who she was - "Let them eat cake", the beheading...
One thumbs up, I watch this really just to revel in how pretty it is.

Fantastic Mr. Fox

I think popcorn may be a top 5 food for me.
Three quarters thumbs up - it is very beautifully shot as usual, but I just did not really like any characters... hence did not really care about their fate...

Team America

Apparently Matt Damon's character was supposed to be intelligent and articulate, but when they saw how retarded the puppet looked, they decided to make him retarded.
One thumbs up - I put off watching this for so long because I was scared of the puppets; am still slightly scared but the comedy helped.

Sicko

Their current system is disgusting - sometimes you (government) have to accept these costs, if the bottom line means healthier citizens who can go see a doctor indiscriminately.
One thumbs up, it is so relevant at the moment, even ten years later.

The Man from U.N.C.L.E.

The sexual tension between Armie Hammer and Alicia Vikander is delectable!!

One thumbs up - that was really entertaining, and surprised Guy Ritchie produced this; it is quite unlike him and very pretty. 

About a Boy

And to think that bowl haired boy grew up and saw Jennifer Lawrence's boobs.
One and a half thumbs up, for the movie, not the boob thought (that was weird...)

Analyse This

HE FINALLY DANCED!! AND TO GLORIA ESTEFAN'S 'CONGA'! Oh thank you Gloria!!
Quarter thumbs up - eh, it was moderately entertaining for a Saturday night in.

You've Got Mail

After five sittings, I have finally finished making Josh watch it!
Two thumbs up! He hated it, but tee hee it was fun watching him watch it.

Guardians of the Galaxy: vol 2

I quite liked the gold people; not in the sense that they were nice, but I found their world really interesting.
Three quarters thumbs up, and Baby Groot is as cute as you expect!!

Ratatouille

Turns out there are lots of recipes for 'Remy's Ratatouille' on the internet; I might try the one that serves with goats cheese... yum!
Two thumbs up -  Josh likes to joke that this is my favourite Pixar movie (it's not; it is Finding Nemo) as payback for 'A Bug's Life'... but joke's on him because I love Ratatouille and am not ashamed!

Little Women

If I must be honest, I am probably more a mix of Amy and Meg, with a splash of Jo. But no one would ever accuse me of being Beth. 

One and a half thumbs up, and oh god Christian Bale is so young and adorable in this!

La Dolce Vita

I thought there was only one Italian woman "Maddalena"... turns out there is an "Emma" (overdose lady) and "Maddalena" (rich lady). I clearly did not get it. 

Zero thumbs - it was beautiful to watch, but clearly I got confused and did not really understand it. It seems I am not intellectual enough. 

The Sandlot

I love Wendy's style!
Half a thumbs up, it was not terrible, and I can see why you might like it when you were younger.

A League of Their Own

"There is no sleeping in baseball!" - Josh
One and a half thumbs up, and Kit has not become any less annoying with time.

Moana

I really do not agree with Reddit when it comes to movie recommendations (Moana, Princess Bride).
Half a thumbs up, it has its moments, but overall nothing amazing.
Post-edit: Josh disagrees with my rating; he says from watching me watch it, the body language gave it at least one thumbs up. 

La La Land

Don't care if you didn't like the film, but nothing shitted me more during the Oscars controversy than people going "suck on that La la Land" when they had not seen EITHER La La Land OR Moonlight.
One and a half thumbs up, Emma Stone is so captivating!

The Parent Trap

I was home alone tonight and needed something wholesome (so I don't get scared).
Nostalgic one thumbs up, and Meredith's 90s gym gear is all the rage again now.

The Incredibles

Josh is silly and laughed when Mr. and Mrs. Incredible were having a touching moment.
Half a thumbs up, I don't like it as much as other people do.

The Ugly Truth

And not "The Hard Truth"
One thumbs down - it is terrible... but still entertaining enough.

Beauty and the Beast

Emma Watson looks the part, but cannot act the part - she just does not have that playful feistiness.
Three quarters thumbs up - terrible editing that made me dizzy, but stay for the Gaston scenes - he was gold!

Allied

If you enjoy Marion Cotillard acting circles around a dead-pan Brad Pitt, then this is the movie for you!
Zero thumbs up - good story, poorly executed.

Hidden Figures

Not too heavy, but with nice heartfelt and funny moments. 

One thumbs up - it was exactly what I expected, and perfect for a quiet Saturday night in. 

Batman: The Dark Knight Rises

As silly as Bane's voice was at times, I really did not notice it most of the time.
One thumbs up, and Tom Hardy is still hot (you just have to find the right pictures hehe "in a suit").

Logan

Good movie, terrible trailer.
One thumbs up, but grossed out by the smelly wet foot smell (I suspect from the guy behind me).

The Blind Side

Six weeks to Bali, and I am reduced to eating crispy kale as a snack because I am starving.
One thumbs up - I do enjoy it though, both the movie and crispy chilli olive oil kale.

Moonlight

I liked part two the most, the teenage years; I loathe drugs and bullies though.
One thumbs up, and teared up at the most unexpected time - when Kevin lovingly and carefully assembles the rice on the chef's special plate - that was a strange moment to cry!

Fun with Dick and Jane

Unlikeable and unsympathetic white characters steal their way out of bankruptcy.
Zero thumbs up - this is why you have need to have savings, fools.

Louis Theroux: My Scientology Movie

One of the IMdB listed trivia for this movie is that Louis Theroux's middle name is Sebastian, which is a character from The Little Mermaid which also features a chef named Louis - this is not useful or relevant trivia! Leave it blank rather than include this rubbish!
Three quarters thumbs up for reinforcing how Scientology is a hotbed of money-grabbing professional harrassers.

Fifty Shades Darker

Terribly inappropriate times to have sex:
* When you should be fighting about New York and why is he so controlling and borderline abusive
* When you have just been in a helicopter crash and seemingly just walked home without going to hospital
One and a half thumbs down - it is so good at being so bad, and wait, did Kim Basinger just do a weird handkerchief mic-drop after having a cocktail thrown in her face?! Yes, oh yes she did.

Kill Bill: vol: 1

Well this would certainly pass the Bechdel test - does talk about killing each other count?
Two thumbs up - love this movie, and it just occurred to me that it has more female lead characters than male; and amazing women and that, namely The Bride and Lucy Liu.

Lion

I have seen poverty, but I do not know poverty - and appreciate my parents more because of that.
One and three quarters thumbs up - that was so beautiful, even though I cried for 80% of the movie.

Midnight in Paris

When we walked down into Hubert the other day, I felt exactly like this - entering another world that was so Frenchy, and romantic. Oh soft candlelight!

Two thumbs up, and I am so happy Josh actually kind of liked it. 

Fifty Shades of Grey

Working on my fifty shades of awesome colour puzzle!

Zero thumbs up - it is lame, but some of those sex scenes are pretty sexy.

Jackass: The Movie

"Well you have a toy car up your ass" - old man doctor.
Zero thumbs up.

Sleepless in Seattle

That is some pretty stalker-ish behaviour there Meg Ryan!
One thumbs up, but god that kid Jonah is a smug annoying brat.

La La Land

LA sunsets, and oh the music is so beautiful!
Two thumbs up!! Is it too hasty to give a full two thumbs up right away? Alright I will make it just shy of two thumbs up because I actually did not care for Ryan Gosling's singing voice that much.

Die Hard

It was a Die Hard way to ring in the New Year - if by die hard you mean chicken and chocolate mousse.
One and a half thumbs up, I forgot how good an action movie it was.