Saturday, 7 November 2020

Superbad

Rain yelped 'Evan!' in the perfect Becca tone before movie-Becca did. It was so funny.
Two thumbs up - yes these background viewings count because you KNOW we are listening and stifled laughing in the lead-up to our favourite lines (all of them). Be glad I didn't count the time we watched it on one fifth of the TV size with no sound (watch party fundraiser) only because we stopped after like 40 minutes because we got tired. 

Tampopo

It's like the '22 Short Films about Springfield' episode of the The Simpsons. Except that there were a number of curve-ball short films (and one long slow zoom) that I did not expect in a film about ramen. 
One and three quarters thumbs up - might be hastily a bit too positive but whatever! I was all 'hand them the two-thumbs-up' during the ramen storyline which was just the sweetest adorable Ghibli-esque thing. But then the salt and lemon (and lemon seeds??) happened and then my soul retched a bit at the prawns, and egg yolk. So yeah slight downgrade. But it's still good, it's still good!! 

Saturday, 31 October 2020

Borat Subsequent Moviefilm

I kind of knew about the Rudy Guiliani bit; not that surprised by am impressed they got that on camera. So my favourite/shocking part was the song! Oh wow!
Three quarters thumbs up - okay fun but the original is definitely better.

Friday, 30 October 2020

Get Out

I look around and see apprehensive people... and a nervous cat (Ben).
Two thumbs up - great tight movie. And thankful for the 'sex slave!' moments to give us a comedic break.  

Saturday, 24 October 2020

Kajillionaire

Again, there is something about FICTIONAL mid-range 'bad' people that is so much more unlikeable than straight up evil villains. 
One thumbs down - no I did not enjoy watching a cult-like family be neglectful to each other and parasites to society. And all for such a low sum of money. 

Thursday, 22 October 2020

Bombshell

Oh god that Margot Robbie scene was so uncomfortable, I could feel it through the screen. I wonder if men feel as grossed out watching that? 
One thumbs up - I thought it was good acting by everyone. But the real MVP is the prosthetics person - MY GOD that was amazing work!

Wednesday, 21 October 2020

Little Women

I just still don't believe Timothee Chalamet can pull Florence Pugh from an ice hole. Like if I were Amy, I would be like "oh yes, save me Christian Bale!" But if I saw Timothee Chalamet I would like "um... this doesn't look good for me." I would have more confidence in Saoirse or Florence. 
One and three quarter thumbs up - against popular opinion, I generally like the more girly character (Sansa over Ayra, Amy as much as Jo), so I am so happy there is finally more understanding and redemption given to Amy. I love that and so much more about this version EXCEPT how it is non-linear. There is just nothing to gain by doing this, and I feel we lose the foundation and build up to a lot of relationships but namely Jo and Laurie. Can someone find a (free) program so I can edit this to my liking please? 

Saturday, 17 October 2020

Cats

Must you walk with shoulder shimmy ALL THE TIME?? Why is the Tay-Tay cat the only one with boobs? WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE THIS SEXY?? Please stop. Oh god it's not stopping. 
Two thumbs/paws down - that was as freaky on the eyes as expected. Equal parts horrific and laughably ridiculous. Also equal parts hate for the creepy CGI as well as the source material. It is literally a shitty cat meet-and-greet/talent show with the weakest plotline, and not even good songs. As someone said "this is a successful musical?!"

Saturday, 10 October 2020

Emma

I am SO CONFUSED about who all the men are. Mr. Elton, Mr. Knightley, Mr. Churchill, Mr. Martin, Mr. Dixon, Mr. Weston, that older man who made the "M and A" joke - who are you all?? I think it's because the crazy sideburns make everyone look the same. 
Three quarters thumbs up - why are all the interior scenes so dark?? Like I get they didn't have electricity then, but WE are allowed to use electricity to light up the set. 

Friday, 9 October 2020

Fast Times at Ridgemont High

There are a number of ratings we need to discuss. The movie rating. The Vietnamese chilli chicken pizza rating (7.5/10 which is comparable to bringing this pizza to a 6 or 7 pizza party but NOT a four-person-four-pizza party). The shoulder stiffness rating (personal thumbs from Michelle into my 9 out of 9 rock hard shoulders). Good times! 
Half a thumbs up - eh maybe it's a context thing, or you have to be a cool kid, but it didn't do it for me. I think I need an over-arching story or plotline. These kids barely even had obstacles. 

Pride and Prejudice

Regency era England:
Pros: you get to be super excited about ribbons! 
Cons: they take the whole concept of 'family' and 'face' way too seriously, and you barely have any agency as a woman. 
One and a half thumbs up - this is the type of movie I should like (period piece, Keira Knightley) and I did. But I shan't hop on the Darcy love train because I personally don't believe he makes up for being a judgemental and hypocritical dick. But his nose appeared to get smaller which was good. 

Wednesday, 7 October 2020

The Devil All The Time

So Daniel really really hates voice-overs. And he is slowly inceptioning me because whilst I don't hate it, I am so much more aware of it. 
Three quarters thumbs up - I was roped in because I needed to know why and how things were going to go down; but it was only alright in the end. 

The Last Black Man in San Francisco

Two men on a skateboard made me smile.  
Half a thumbs up - afterwards I read a review that described it as a 'mood-piece' which I thought was perfect. It was very beautiful but too slow for me (I fell asleep at some point). 

Saturday, 3 October 2020

Superbad

So the other day I had to get a pap smear. Afterwards, the doctor goes 'Oh you did really well. Very relaxed.' And all I could think was 1. 'Not my first rodeo' and 2: "Some women pride themselves on their dick-taking abilities." "Dick-taking abilities? You think that's a good thing to say about someone?" "The fucked-up thing is, I actually do, okay?"
Two thumbs up - and the new quote I never noticed before is "ball dick ball... like a division sign". Thank you Ben and Rain as per us(ual). 

Friday, 2 October 2020

Punch Drunk Love

So it seems like Anna is the unofficial filter of what is good or will be popular. When Nicole likes it, it is not necessarily a thing. But when Anna likes it (maybe a tad later), ohhh now it is good! :p
Zero thumbs up - was not sure if I was falling asleep because of the punch or because it was boring... but consensus said it was boring. I liked the pudding bit... but that was about it. 

Portrait of A Lady on Fire

It probably was because this idea was inceptioned in my head ages before, but I truly did feel lightly repulsed when the inoffensive man appeared on screen, after spending all this time with the women only. Like why are you in our space?
One and three quarters thumbs up - it was so beautiful! Both visually and the storyline. And I think overall beautiful in its simplicity. 

Wednesday, 30 September 2020

Birds of Prey: And The Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn

Me a month ago: "Yay!! Netflix will have that Harley Quinn movie next month! I have heard it wasn't terrible"
Daniel: "If you are excited because it is NOT terrible, then your standards are too low" 
One quarter thumbs up - it wasn't terrible... but it wasn't great. Female superheroes, Asian-American director... I wish it was better though! 

Saturday, 26 September 2020

Heat

Things I was disproportionately annoyed at about this film (non or barely a spoiler):
1. Eady - the age difference.
2. Eady - dumb bitch. 
3. Val Kilmer - this guy was an 80s/90s heart-throb? Seriously? This guy? 
I can't even with all this. 
One and a quarter thumbs up - it was good, but not Fugitive-good. But personal thumbs up to me for blinding nominating this film to the 'will Daniel like this?' query and scoring a positive rating!

Friday, 25 September 2020

Dogtooth

That moment when the first thing happened (which in hindsight was totally tame in comparison) and I looked around and we were all frozen with hands over our faces or eyes in shock. 
Three quarters thumbs up - "I have been frowning this whole movie" - Jessica, on behalf of all of us. That was highly disturbing and frustrating. BUT WHY?? 

Enola Holmes

If I were in mid-high school, I would totally start incorporating this aesthetic into my life and fan-girl over the boy. But alas I am old now so Henry Cavill in the three piece suit is what does it. 
A quarter thumbs up - I have this weird sliding scale of suspending belief. I can suspend a tiny bit of belief or a lot of belief - the extremes. But a medium amount? No deal. I just could not deal with everyone's cavalier attitude to a missing lady.